When Sex Leads to Broken Furniture

broken furniture from sex

Have you ever had one of those wild, rip each other’s clothes off, tear the room up sex sessions with your lover? You know (or I hope you do) the kind. I had one of these nights recently and, in addition to walking a little funny the next day, it also resulted in broken furniture!

I still can’t believe it, but it happened.

Yes, we fucked so hard we broke the couch!

It all happened one Saturday night; stockings and heels are a powerful weapon and before we knew it our clothes were flying in all directions. Except the stockings and heels—those bad boys stay on! I am a lady after all.

So there we were, going at it full force on the couch, various positions and lots of filthy talk involved. God, was it hot! We were like something straight out of a really good, really dirty porn.

When the screaming, convulsing and cumming was all said and done, we lay there sweaty and sprawled on the couch, half sitting and half falling off.

Honestly, I keep so many pillows on the couch that it wasn’t until Monday that I realized the arm of the couch was a bit lower and not as plump as the other side. Hmm…

broken furniture from sexAs I further inspected, the pieces began to click in my head. We broke the fucking couch. Or better yet, our fuck fest broke the couch! I’m not sure which position it was, but if I had to venture a guess I’d say it’s a safe bet that it was while he had me bent over giving it to me doggy-style. The couch apparently couldn’t stand the heavy pounding any longer and it simply gave out.

Now, I will admit that I’ve had my fair share of sex-blunders and bloopers in my lifetime. I’ve fallen off the bed, right on my ass with my legs in the air, while getting slammed missionary style. I’ve had lamps and pictures fall from the vibration or from someone who really knows how to tear up a room. I’ve had clothes go missing (who loses a shoe? I mean come on! A shoe?). I’ve accidentally hit the shift while having sex in the car. I have to say though, this was a first for me. I’ve never broken furniture before!

I attempted to fix it, but it’s no use. It’s beyond repair. The entire side of the couch basically caved under the pressure of the absolutely amazing pounding I received that weekend. Maybe it was the multiple slam sessions we’ve had on the couch that really did it in. Whatever the reason, the couch is crushed as a result of my sexual exploits.


It’s all good though— not only am I sexually satisfied, but now I get to go shopping too. Win-Win!

I’d love to hear if you’ve even broken furniture while doing the wild thing. Be sure to leave me your wild adventures down below.


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  1. Oh this made me laugh out loud! I can’t say I’ve broken any furniture as of yet, but I did manage to break a pair of handcuffs, does that count? 😛

  2. LOVE THIS!! That’s friggen awesome BSG!! I’ve never broken furniture but definitely done some damage. Sometimes you just get into the moment and it’s so good that you don’t give a damn about the consequences … hey at least you have a great story and you can always buy a new furniture!!

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