“So… I’ve been thinking…and I was hoping I could call you my girlfriend” These are the words that Mr. DJ uttered to me last weekend. We’ve been casually dating each other for about 3 weeks (a total of 5 dates &2 sleepovers) and have been talking to each other for about a month and he comes at me with this shit. WTF?! “Um… let’s just see how things go” was the only response I could give without feeling like a complete and total douchebag.
24 hours later, I sprung the conversation on my BFF to get her input. “So, am I a total bitch for answering the way I did” I inquired, to which she of course said no (I love her!) But it didn’t matter, I felt like a complete bitch for dismissing him without an explanation.
What is with men these days and their incessant need to “define this relationship”? When did today’s men grow a set of ovaries and give their testicles to the females? Please, someone tell me just when this twilight zone shift between the sexes occurred because it is freaking me the fuck out! I’m not looking for someone to tie me down unless it involves plastic wrap and bedposts, let’s just get that straight.
I’m not the girl who is going to cling to you, texting or calling you constantly, assuming that we have a standing date at least one night out of every weekend. I’m also not the girl who is going to think that just because we fucked I should change my relationship status on Facebook and tweet about how super duper awesome my new boyfriend is (like, OMG, he’s like sooo super duper sweet and like wicked cute and he REALLY likes me XOXO
Don’t get me wrong, I really do like Mr DJ…. A LOT! It actually scares me how comfortable we are with each other already. The conversation is awesome and we are able to also enjoy the moments of silence without it feeling awkward. The sexual chemistry is also there which is huge! He is incredibly sweet, attentive, chivalrous, caring… I could go on and on but I won’t because I’m starting to sound like THAT girl! Honestly, he could be the total package. So why ruin it, especially so early on, with labels???
Last night while we were texting I let him know that I felt horrible about the way I dismissed him without any explanation and that I was sincerely sorry for that. We had a great conversation and he said he totally understands since we both just got out of relationships not so long ago. Phew! It’s not that I want to alienate him and push him away, I really, really don’t! I just don’t have this desire to put a label on things. Why can’t it just be what it is, in it’s current state? Why can’t we just enjoy whatever it is and see where it goes and how things unfold?
Why do we have to rush to put a label on everything and place everything into nice neat categories? Life can’t be categorized people! Life is messy and unpredictable and fabulously fantastic and chaotic and spontaneous all at the same time! We can’t plan and neatly categorize every aspect of our lives. Sometimes, just sometimes, we have to throw caution to the wind and let things fall.
~Happy landing! 😉 XOXO