If the Stiletto Fits…



Double standards. They happen everywhere, everyday in almost every situation. So, why then, does it surprise me that there is still a double standard that exists regarding single women and dating? Why is it that society finds it perfectly acceptable, and almost expected, that men date multiple women at once and pass no judgement on the practice of serial dating? Yet when the tables are turned and the same behavior is exhibited by a female, all bets are off and she is thought of as (and sometimes called) a slut. Are we really still so Draconian that we cannot see men and women as equal in the single/dating world?

I recently had a very heated discussion with an acquaintance over my active dating life. Apparently, because I’m enjoying my new single status by going on dates with different guys rather than rushing into another relationship, I’m a slut. This acquaintance is not privy to the details of my many first dates (and some second dates) yet she has drawn the conclusion that the simple act of going on dates with different men implies that I certainly must be sleeping with them. Apparently, the fact that I enjoy meeting new people, making new friends and, gasp, going out for dinner and drinks, makes me a harlot.

According to the dictionary, the definition of slut is “a person, especially a woman, considered sexually promiscuous; a woman prostitute; a slovenly woman.” By pure definition I cannot be called a slut since I am not (currently) sexually promiscuous, am not receiving money for sexual acts nor am I slovenly (which for those who don’t know means careless in appearance, messy, dirty).stiletto

The entire conversation made me wonder why such a double standard exists. Why is it that a man can behave in exactly the same manner and he’s considered a lady’s man, a “simultaneous dater”, a player. Why isn’t he called a whore or a slut? Why is it that society views this behavior as normal and expected among the male population, with comments such as “Oh, he’s just being a typical guy” and then in the next breath will say “She’s such a slut” if the conversation is about a woman? Why are there different sets of standards? Shouldn’t we expect just as much out of men as we do out of women?

My opinion…screw society and it’s many flawed standards! I set and live by my own standards! If wearing stilettos with my skinny jeans, a cute shirt and big earrings and meeting a guy for drinks on Friday night makes me a slut, well you know what they say: if the stiletto fits…

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